My opinion may not be very popular, but I feel a huge need to finally write about this topic – especially after the recent hen weekend I had the opportunity to be invited to (and it was amazing! 🤍).
We, women, fight very fiercely for our rights. We take to the streets to mitigate the abortion law, we want equal rights in every area of life, etc. But I often get the impression that no one else is limiting our power, but we ourselves. We don't respect our femininity and don't understand at all what it actually means. How can we be strong when (not entirely consciously) we give up our greatest power, letting ourselves be carried away by the "moment" and, at our own will, disturbing such an important and at the same time delicate system as the female hormonal system?
First, the freedom. If you are a woman, what does freedom mean to you? Is freedom being able to have sex with whoever you want, whenever you want, without worrying about a potential pregnancy? Or maybe freedom could be about freedom of choice – do I want to follow my own (and not always my own, because we know very well how many of us are, at times, influenced, although we are reluctant to admit it) drive, instinct, or maybe I prefer to make a conscious choice not to? I recently came across a great quote:
"Society believes that Freedom is all about the ability to do whatever you want. But true freedom is the ability to not do, what you don't want. Freedom is not just the presence of action, but also the absence of compulsion. For no action that was taken under the burden of desire or fear was really free. You may be free to think. But the real question is, are you free to be quiet?"
Amit of @findingawareness
As my Norwegian friend (you know who 💙) wisely pointed out, no intimacy with a man is indifferent to us women. Every energy that we let into, or even inside ourselves, has a huge impact on us. So why, if not for a fleeting moment of ecstasy that we could basically give ourselves, allow men with whom we would not be ready to have children to influence us? Biologically speaking, sex is not only for pleasure. Contrary to what some Hollywood productions try to tell us, its main purpose is to create new life. Pleasure is of course desirable, but again I think that this also has a lot to do with choosing the right partner.
The second issue is hormones and the female body. I'm a bit horrified by how normal it is to use hormonal contraception these days. And of course, I myself had been taking the pill since I was 17, claiming it was the only sensible way to prevent pregnancy and biting my nails in fear every time I forgot to take one. I took them with small breaks for about 8 years. Only today do I fully realize why it was so difficult for me to get back to health and for 6 months after stopping contraception I did not have a period at all (and that was “only” 6 months, because fortunately I was going to acupuncture regularly at that time, which sped up the return to normality).
Hence, fueled by experience, I offer not so much a warning as a different perspective. Do you want to protect yourself from pregnancy? There is a simple way to do it – get to know your body and your cycle. Your body gives you signals about high fertility and a lack of it. Get to know your secretions, note the length of your cycle along with symptoms (e.g. in such an app) and plan that particular type of encounter to avoid the time around ovulation. It really isn't that hard and, considering how many women have trouble getting pregnant these days, it's pretty effective on its own. Add to that a responsible partner who can control his gunshots (it can be learnt) and with whom you're willing to have children if need be, and you basically have no more worries about unwanted pregnancy.
Of course, potential pregnancy is not the only reason women decide to take hormones. Perhaps, instead of handing over our hormonal problems (irregular cycles, painful periods, irritability, acne) to the oh-so-lucrative contraception business, it would be worth taking an interest in why our hormones don't work the way they should in the first place? Unfortunately, adding a dose of hormones from outside doesn't solve the problem, it only allows you to forget about it until you decide to stop and/or want to have a child. The presence of microplastics in our food and water has a major impact on the hormonal balance (hey, even scientifically proven). It is therefore a good idea to avoid plastic bottles and packaging, replacing them with glass or paper whenever possible. It's also worth paying attention to the quality of the meat you eat and other products that potentially disrupt hormones. In addition, there are many natural ways to regulate hormones. Seed rotation (info e.g. here – sesame, sunflower and pumpkin seeds are best lightly toasted) worked brilliantly for me to regulate the length of my menstrual cycle. Ayurveda also recommends sesame oil massages, warm cooked meals, a wealth of healthy fats in the diet and a regular lifestyle. As I mentioned earlier, the acupuncture also works great for hormonal issues. If you suspect psychological causes (e.g. stress), my beloved Flower Therapy, yoga, or various meditation techniques can of course be very helpful.
You are most welcome to the discussion, of course – I know perfectly well that this is only my “conservative” perspective and I may have not taken many things into account. Nevertheless, I'm very curious about your views. 😊